They have the gold. I have the blues.

Hi Salimah. Sorry we only connect when there are problems but I just googled “Dear RBC, let me count the ways you suck” and the response was “Do you have a bank you boycott?” I’m just about there.

My small business is chugging along but an accountant error has led to an overdue GST amount. I tried to pay online as advised but could only pay personal taxes. The accountant told me to pay from my business account. Same said accountant never advised, during two years of operation, that though I was incorporated, I should have a separate business account. Frankly, I was just operating “on the side” not expecting the opportunities to escalate as they have. Lesson learned, albeit late. Move forward.

So I applied online, but was eventually directed to visit the branch where, once I was there, then emailed my articles of incorporation to Meetkumar (my bad, I only brought the cert, not the package). So, after the lure of “apply online” I drove to the branch at -18C . . . to show my drivers license.

There was talk of a client card. Perhaps I didn’t understand that I needed another (separate/business) one. Perhaps Meetkumar didn’t either or understand there was a postal strike happening. I left thinking it was a done deal. Business account established.

We talked about a credit card and he advised that I could “apply online”. I should have stopped him there . . .

So I tried to apply for a credit card online. Twice I booked calls, I have the email confirmations to prove it. Twice I was stood up with no follow-up. I replied to both emails that the appointments didn’t occur and surprisingly received nice reply emails from the RBC Business Team “Thank you for your email. We have received your comments/questions and we will reply as soon as possible. Thank you!”

That was November 24 and 27. Still waiting . . .

I finally emailed Jennifer H. who has helped us at Chestermere in the past (Tami’s great idea). That did cause me to think of you but it wasn’t a mortgage, more of a general, issue. Jennifer replied with a phone number 1-866-739-6054. Yay Jennifer!

I called and after several holds and clicks, that can either be the start of human interaction or end-of-call, I did speak to a human that told me I did not have the “business center(?)” and more holds and clicks ensued. Eventually, I think it was about 15 minutes by now (but hey I’m semi-retired so I do have half-of-all day) I was connected to a lovely woman, whose name I can’t recall, who helped me to successfully pass the credit card application test. Yay lovely lady!

During the course of the credit check she noted that I had an outstanding GST amount – that may affect my credit rating/application(?). Oh ya! I have a business account now so I can take care of that. I tried, via my sparkly new business account page. No GST/business tax options. Only personal taxes.

Oh ya, the lovely lady wondered why I didn’t have a client card, if not even a temporary one. Luckily I had blank cheques at hand to ID my account. Both her and I emailed Meetkumar about a temporary business client card. He replied, and I’m stopping by the branch Wednesday to “talk to any teller”.

I still wanted/needed to settle my GST tab so, after some fruitless Google and RBC research, I called the number on my personal client card. An AI (I call him “Carl”, the RBC employee of the month) loop ensued. I called the 24/7 business line. More Carl shtick. I yelled, might have swore and lo and behold I was teased that I could talk to a human, but alas without a client or credit card number Carl couldn’t help me. I ended the call. Park the GST quest for awhile bud. It will still be there, albeit with penalties, if/when you’re hopefully better equipped to navigate it.

So Wednesday I drove to the branch, again, and obtained a temporary client card. I called the number on the card to gain understanding as to how to pay my GST arrears via RBC, with my business account established. Hi Carl. I eventually paid my GST returns via the CRA page. The federal government being more accommodating than the finance industry. Well, it’s their income versus RBC’s “service” so that makes sense.

The Canada Post strike/disruption began Nov 15 so the company credit card was “in the mail”. But I remembered the lovely on-line-credit-card-application lady’s advice that “as soon as I see the CC account number on my account page to call the number and ask to have it expedited.” She knew there was a postal strike happening/imminent (don’t quote my timing on this, it was either and the point being we all knew it). So I did. I checked every day and as soon as I saw the number I called and spoke to a human! I learned how to end run Carl, another sidebar. I was told that all first issue credit cards had to be picked up in person at the branch. I don’t know what the “expedited” timing was but it was getting tight. I was planning to leave for a trip south mid-December.

A mortgage was due December 31. I had scheduled a meeting at the branch to explore options while considering alternatives (see “boycott a bank” above) or at least start moving my accounts away from the Might Blue-and-Gold.

I thought this a handy time, and timing, to speak to a person and pre-emptively check on the “expedited” card. I could picture it arriving inter-company courier (ha! !fool) and sitting in an inbox/mailsack until someone does the weekly check and calls me the day after my departure. I’m going to do my part and selfishly help this process along. As I’m waiting to meet with Prikshat about the mortgage I overhear another RBC gal say to a customer “wait, let me check the inter-company mail”. Hope wells up in me! Prikshat and I meet, chat and I receive two underwhelming mortgage options. I ask about the credit card. I get a head-wobble and apology. Not a reason, even when pressed, just platitudes. I honestly think he didn’t know how/what to do. I now know that I have encountered four distinct “zones” within the RBC that shale neither cross, assit nor communicate with each other. They are:
Personal banking.

Business banking.

Personal credit cards.

Business credit cards.

So how could poor Prikshat help me? He was a personal banking mortgage guy. I was looking for a business credit card.

I left with a promise of an email follow-up to the mortgage and no credit card.

Meanwhile, as this is unfolding, I receive a couple voicemails and then an email from Waheed in the Strathmore branch wanting to discuss my imminent mortgage renewal. Aha, a human contact that my possibly be interested in providing some help outside their narrow lane, to help themselves secure a mortgage renewal. I reply to Waheed’s last email; “If you can help me with my credit card, I’ll talk to you about the mortgage” No response yet.

Time is short. My partner is in California waiting for my arrival, hopefully before Christmas. The postal strike ends and I forward my mail to my brother’s place beginning Dec 21, the day I arrive in Reno NV.

The holiday season ensues. The mail begins to flow. My brother is diligent, weirdly thinking that his helping me is akin to some game show. He calls it “The Letter Game!” At least once a week he texts me a picture of the mail expecting directions; open, send pix etc.

January 11 two client cards arrive. The first one that was cancelled by the temporary issue and the second replacement one. Hallelujah! He airmails them. They arrive 23 January latest. It may have been earlier, we had to learn how to operate the US mailbox, another story. Hope wells again! If the client cards made it surely the credit cards can’t be far behind! Wait, I was told I would have to pick them up in person . . . fudge.

The following week, I’m doing the year-end books/taxes. I need that credit card so I can have my corporate bills paid by/on it. Makes it easier for me and the accountant while starting to establish my business’s credit. Late I know but, as before, who know how busy I would be, or seriously I would have to take it? Still, I started this initiative in mid-November. Even with the mail disruption and restart . . . come on . . .

I’m not desperate but its worth checking/questioning/pleading about an alternative. I call the number on my new client card. They call back. That’s a nice service/option. Long pauses/hold ensue before, and as, I am moved to the credit card team. One of the identity qualifying questions asked was “What are the last four digits of your credit card?”.

Finally I’m told that a card was issued December 2. There were postal delays. I can have a card sent to me now. I’m thinking, if a card was sent, was it lost? I received the client cards. I’m suspect but still polite and it sounds like they may be able, even perhaps willing, to accommodate. “Ok, I’m in California, How will the card be sent? Canada post? Again?”. “No” I’m assured “It can be couriered in two business days.” That’s Tuesday and regardless, hopeful progress. Too late for the first few February invoices but, whatever. However, to get a tracking number I need to call back tomorrow. I try to get a “direct line” number. No dice, “Call the number on your client card”. Sunday morning I call, wait on hold for about 20 minutes, and then again, as I am passed to the credit card team. That nice lady asks if I know which courier was used. Uh, no. Also “What are the last four digits of your credit card?”. Finally I’m told the card will arrive in 5-7 business days and to call back Tuesday or Wednesday to get a tracking number.

I finally lose it. Really! Why! I channel “Karen” and ask that this be “elevated”. No chance. The call recording will attest to the mix of my disbelief, empathy for the front-line folks that suffer for the system’s faults (no I’m not using the PC correct “challenges” term here . . . intentionally) and 10-12 weeks of cumulative frustration. No options. Five to seven days. The one concession gained, but yet to believed, is that that the RBC will call me Tuesday . . . or Wednesday with a tracking number. Uh huh.

Throughout this there has been a consistent pattern of spoken empathy and apologies, whether or not any solutions, insights or reasoning were given. They have been trained well to be polite regardless of their training, support or competence.

We shopped a mortgage broker for that mortgage. They beat my >20 year financial provider’s closed fixed by 0.02 with an an open variable.

I may have a business credit card this week. Maybe not. And, seriously, no one else knows any more than I, except maybe the person driving the courier truck.

Those credit cards weren’t sent. Think about it. It makes the long holds and pauses during Saturday’s inquiry more suspicious than inept.

Early Monday morning following Sunday’s passionate phone conversation I was awake at 3pm, annoyed, because I was awake and also with the RBC. If only I could, waitaminute . . . I wrote a note, opened Google maps, found the Chestermere RBC branch and posted a review. Then I repeated that for every branch in NE Calgary. This was easy! And fun! And liberating! And tiring. I returned to slumber, thankful.

When I awoke I had another idea. Earlier, before the G-maps rampage, while trying to find a complaint contact at RBC, I came across the Senior Leader Team’s biographies. After a stretch, breakfast, a mocha and meditation, I revisited that page. Copy, paste, lower the upper case letters, add a period between names and suffix with @rbc.com. Boom! RBC senior leaders email list. After using the email to Salimah that starts this page and updating what had transpired since, I sent them all this Monday evening.

Tuesday 4-Feb-25 update.
This morning I received no bounced email notifications. Win! And an email from Salimah apologizing and wishing me luck. Such a nice lady.

Next a voicemail from another RBC lady providing a hurried verbal update: the courier tracking number. I listened to it 4-5 times to get it written down, hopefully correctly. No courier provider was given. Within a few hours UPS arrived and Hallelujah, my company credit card arrived! When I was chatting, perhaps very passionately with that gal, she asked me to access my account on-line to provide the last four digits of the yet-to-be-delivered credit card. There was my chequing and a Visa account. I recalled applying for a Mastercard and being offered a Visa credit line. I shared that and that I was confused and perhaps disappointed, again. No, no I was assured it was a Visa card that I should be expecting. OK. This is not a show stopper either way. What arrived today? A Mastercard.

Then another call form the RBC. It was Tazmoon, Regional Vice-President Calgary. He apologized. He was concerned about the lost mortgage and gave the corp-speak about senior leaders, clients, training, communication etc. We had a pleasant chat, nice fellow, doing his job; some kind of low-level damage control I must presume. Apologies and his number were offered.

I have my business client card and credit card. That was the only goal three months ago. This will be forgotten except, perhaps for preservation of a story here, or, until a year from now and my January-February invoices are found on my personal accounts. Perhaps I’ll drop someone at RBC a note. Likely not. I will probably call Tazmoon should I have any mortgage plans. He said to.

Epliogue

Even when we’re self-actualized are we not still somewhat untrue assessors of our abilities? Either way, we may think we’re better than others may perceive or perhaps harder on ourselves than anyone else may be. Still, if you know what self-actualization is, chances are your assessment of your character and abilities is pretty close to the mark, And really, who’s to argue, except maybe the ex and/or their lawyer.

I have an ex-wife and her and her lawyer taught me (or taught me to learn) some things: watch (and who’s keeping) the books closer, cook and listen.

Other roles and responsibilities in my life have reinforced those valuable lessons, with some professional help, along the way. Most of my career paths have been success-dependent upon communication. How to listen actively and empathetically are so important, to everyone. Knowing that if the message isn’t/wasn’t received or understood that its the responsibility of the deliverer. History would prove that I’ve improved. At my age, surely some abilities must have improved, no?

Well, let’s see, ok?

Our personal Westjet credit card is used for all our monthly and re-occurring expenses where possible. Gas, groceries, utilities, entertainment etc. That account is paid monthly, if not weekly. No debt, rack the travel points, thanks. Those cards are due to expire at the end of February. I see the notice on my webpage, though I can’t claim when it appeared; Your new credit card has been mailed! You can expect your card to arrive within 7 business days. If you’ve already received it, select Activate Now.” We’re aware they are. We are knew to forwarded mail and like i’ve shared, my brother is an excellent steward of that. He’s been on the lookout since January, long before the date and RBC notification.

One listening piece gleaned from the business client and credit card debacle was “well, you should always reach out to us when needed.” Hello Carl? Can i speak to an agent? Carl?

It’s the morning of Friday February 7th. I’m calling RBC to see if I can get our Westjet cards expedited to California before the end of the month. Plenty of time, right? And the lady said so, as did Tazmoon. I call. I’m calm. Zen calm. I will apply all lessons learned and have a fruitful and satisfying experience. I call the number on the Westjet card. Hi Carl. I state my situation a few times with similar multiple replies on how to navigate my portal to check balances, replace a card etc. I know. This is a bit of a twist. I’m reaching out to a human for this specific situation. Only when I refuse the offered credit limit increase does Carl capitulate and direct me to a human. First hurdle cleared.

I explain our situation to the nice man who’s name I can’t recall. I wish I could, but being a tad hearing impaired I have challenges with hearing and remembering names in person, let alone over the phone.

Cards are due to expire.

Yes, the replacements have been mailed.

My perception of delayed mail back log

– recent challenges,

– and unfamiliarity with forwarding delays

– cause me to request our cards are expedited via courier to our California address

Please. Thank you

So, yes they can send the second set of replacement cards, through the courier.

Second hurdle cleared

I confirm (positive communication feedback loop) that they will come via courier, not the postal system. Yes, he confirms what I’ve confirmed. Third hurdle cleared; no postal service involved.

We’re rollin’. Buddha and Dale Carnegie would be proud.

I should see the cards in two business days, which is Tuesday. Unfortunately a tracking number can’t be provided until Monday. Ok, we’ve established that it’s via courier and though I should be leery, based on the two versions of that previously encountered (remember 2-day courier vs. 5-7 day courier?), I have no options but to accept that. I do. We should see cards before the current ones expire. Third hurdle cleared? Hopeful.

I clearly recall asking about the next possible, hopefully last, hurdle that came to mind. Better to ask and clarify than presume, another learned communication skill. So, the new cards will replace those in the mail but the cards in our possession will remain active until the third set are received? Yes was the answer. Excellent. I mean it’s the same situation, no? Cards are sent to replace those about to expire. Yes, there was another set in transit but how can/should that be a problem? Think about it. Just like they didn’t exist because they kind of don’t until they’re activated upon reception by the client, correct?

Later that afternoon we go for a walk and stop for few things at Safeway. It’s Superbowl Friday 2pm-ish. It’s busy. Tami’s Westjet card is denied three times at the self-checkout.

I call Tazmoon, leave a voicemail. He calls back, I miss it. I didn’t want to play that card but after a few quiet swears I do so.

The next is from a community care representative (?). Pleasant fellow, he’s here to help as per Tazmoon’s direction. I explain what’s happened at least three times. Our “daily driver” cards are void and the new ones a re few days aways . . . allegedly. He can’t initially understand because he knows what I know; once a card is cancelled it can never be reactivated. So finally, somewhat understandably he understatedly exasperatedly, asks; “What is it I can do to help?” I request the impossible (why not?) “I would like our current cards restored” until the expedited replacements are delivered. He replies with the obvious and well-known. “That’s impossible, but let me try. If not what else can we do for you?”. I ask for the tracking number and he replies that he can email me that Monday. If that happens it will be a vast improvement over the hurried phone call tracking number delivery of last week. This is what that looked like

He confirms our Cali address and apologizes again. Good job guy.

We stop for a pint. I reflect. How could I have created a better outcome of this situation? I guess I should have re-re-clarified the card cancellation concern. Perhaps I’m missing some technical detail within the system but my logic holds, for me, for now. No cards were asked to be cancelled. I wanted replacement of the replacements. Does that mess with the system? If so, and there are no other options, should that have been explained? Should I have asked for confirmation? Yes.

Also, is this going to affect any payments

Any feedback I’ve had on the preceeding chapters of the Jeff-vs-RBC have advised that I leave, soon and wholly.

My Brother-in-law Kevin married my oldest sister when I was 10. Yes, big family, several litters and another story. Kevin worked for the RBC for several years. While he was, we were younger and I was shopping banks he told me it was all about people not brand. Find a place where you can make a connection with someone, hopefully, that you like and is attentive to your needs, regardless of brand. I did so, eventually and gradually as I grew up, growing all my business at RBC.

The question now is; “Is that possible any longer?” Self-actualized, mind you, and soberly considering my options, there are few and far between. After 20+ years, several mortgages and a couple business ventures along, I seriously consider and doubt it. These recent events leave me feeling like a helpless victim of a large unwieldy unempathetic, unconcerned organization.

Oh, the RBC stocks are doing well and my judgement of performance is purely selfishof course. It’s a wash on the credit cards because I don’t pay interest and they rebate my annual fees regularly. I pay RBC “X” amount per month for account services, I gain very little interest because they are not (surprise!?) my choice of investment options. All good and fine until I encounter the simplest challenge in my daily business or personal banking. Then what? Confusion, misinformation, more conflicting misinformation mere hours apart, lots of apologies, head bobbles and other than verbal recognition of the hassles I’ve endured solely authoured by the might blue and gold, no tangible compensation for my heartache, time (which I bill hourly), effort, focus and possible (TBD)missed/bounced payments.

And that’s the way it is folks. Not a happy ending in sight, really. RBC and their peer corporations get (their shareholders) wealthier as the level of service for those footing the bill one meagerly mortgage at a time decreases. God help me if I wasn’t online and computer savvy. Those folks still exist, they built this world that our bank manager kids can thrive in.

I’ll hope for an email with a tracking number tomorrow. Will I invest time in following up if I don’t? Will I see new cards Tuesday/Wednesday? Will I then re-engage should they not arrive. Dunno. Hope for the best. Stay tuned and put this sh*t behind as soon and as fast as possible.